Legend of Heroes II: Prophecy of the Moonlight Witch has to be one of the most average role-playing games I have ever played. Now, I don’t necessarily mind if a title hits several of the RPG cliché marks, since some staples simply work in many instances, but when you have the aloof boy waking up late to go on a grand adventure with his more mature female counterpart, the fighter and healer respectively, my eyes begin with roll without my realizing it. At least there’s a pretext here as to why a 14-year-old is taking sword in hand and going on an adventure with his 15-year-old companion -- their pilgrimage to complete their village’s coming-of-age ceremony -- which is at least something.

So here you are, the young, skidding Jurio, going around the land of Tirasweel with your childhood friend Chris in a pilgrimage to see all of the shrines throughout the various kingdoms. Thanks to your handy silver dagger, marking the sign of a pilgrim, you’ll get to stay at inns for free and cross borders with little hassle; plus people seem to really, really like pilgrims, and it’s always nice to be welcomed.

Along the way, you will encounter an array of characters that range from the slightly maniacal and highly repetitious uncle, the brooding avenger, the bumbling thieves, and so on. Throughout colorful and recycled landscapes, you will fight such deadly beasts as giant flowers, monkeys, and amalgamations of lard, fur, and pastel. You will also be assisted by your pet: a cat that can assist in the beginning of combat, if fed particular foods beforehand, and sniff out potions and items for you on the map. The pet will also feel different emotions, none of which seem to have any bearing on its performance or the game itself, but every now and then you can feel superior by petting it or scolding it, and I’m never one to shy away from an opportunity to show dominance over the animal kingdom.

The shrines produce visions played out in some really nice-looking CG sequences and are surrounded by towns that look eerily similar to each other with a camera view way too close to navigate efficiently. Going from town to town takes place on a world map that is populated with enemies that have icons indicating if they notice you, are weaker and evading you, or are stronger and aggressively chasing you. It’s easy to avoid most encounters, but doing so won’t help you in leveling up so you can get access to more skills, spells, and finishing moves, all of which have animations that seem to belie a power being unleashed that is far from actuality.

The main problem with Legend of Heroes II is that it’s boring. The conversations are meandering and feature numerous typographical errors, and the errands you perform for people tend to be nothing more than running around until the game decides it’s time for you or a non-playable character to react with a cutscene that resolves the problem. There is actually very little to do other than listen to people ramble and, as Jurio, everyone annoys you by pointing out how shy and afraid you are. There is no real incentive to continue either as each subsequent town has weapons and armor a little better than the next, with neither salesmen nor monsters giving access to anything great enough to pique your interest as to what will become accessible next. The monsters are of the general unimaginative sort, as are the characters, and as is the story. The music is a brighter spot, with classical tracks playing when in libraries and also some vaudeville tracks in certain Benny Hill-esque parts.

Combat is really the only thing that stands out. The characters can only attack in a certain radius, making it prudent for a character to wait a turn out or try to plan an attack in tandem with another in the party, lest they find themselves far away from the pack and vulnerable. Since there is no indication of who goes when, planning ahead becomes very difficult. It’s not bad when it all comes together though, as random as that is.

Overall: 5/10

It’s hard to fail when you don’t try to do anything beyond average. Everything about Legend of Heroes II: Prophecy of the Moonlight Witch is typical: the monsters, characters, items, story, everything is generic. Fans of the original will enjoy it, no doubt, along with the ability to load saved games from the previous title and read in the game’s history about the events in-between now and then, but something as barebones as that is going to appeal to them and only them anyway – much like the game itself. Sometimes a generic role-playing game isn’t bad: you don’t ask much from it and it doesn’t ask much from you, leaving you with the appropriate expectations for such a game. That’s about what you have here.